By: Derek Yu

On: May 27th, 2008


Or: “A man and his phallic symbol embark on a fantasy adventure.”

GINORMO SWORD (full title: “Long and Thick My Ginormo”) is a new Flash game from Barbarageo, creators of the fairly mediocre but similarly awesome-sounding UCHUFORCE 2 (Gesundheit!). It’s a simple hack n’ slash fantasy game – your character follows the mouse cursor and you can attack by clicking the left mouse button. The aim of each area is to uncover the various hidden battle zones, defeat the monsters within, and eventually defeat the boss of the area, allowing you to move on.

Along the way you’ll encounter helpful townspeople and mages who will let you upgrade your sword and learn magicks. One such character is the blacksmith, who, along with leveling your weapon, will let you increase the “length” and “thickness” of your sword. As far as I can tell, these size increases are mostly cosmetic, but then again, isn’t just having a longer and thicker “sword” enough?

It’s actually a pretty entertaining game, though. Fun graphics, too. Just be prepared to slam your left-mouse button a few thousand times to get through.

(Source: Jean Snow, via Game|Life)

  • Radix

    Oh wow, I didn’t notice the new pet that gets unlocked.

  • wooha

    anyone have the link to the wiki?

  • Phasma Felis

    This really offers some perspective on the sort of people who stop eating or pooping to play WoW 24/7. I mean, here you have a game that is *intentionally designed* to look and sound like ass, has no plot and very little depth, and where combat literally consists of clicking the mouse as fast as you can for upwards of 10 minutes, but it still tickles the “kill/loot/level up” cycle in our brains enough to attract a host of enthusiastic players.

  • Radix

    There’s also the element of sharing the experience with other players and talking about it a little as you go. If I’d found this game on my own, I doubt I’d have bothered playing at all since I have much better things to be doing. But people mentioning something or other that sounded interesting in this comments thread has brought be back in several times over a couple of days.

  • grindFish

    @ Phasma Felis
    i totally get you there. I’d scoff at my friends addiction of wow, but i myself cant stop playing this piece of shit of a game. I’m traped in a vortex of mediocre repetitive tasks so im powerful enough to kill the golden knight in less that an hour of clicking :(

    I must be insane. My mind is rotting. yet i want more. God damn you. If he stuck ads in this game and added it to facebook Barbarageo would be a fucking millionaire crack slanging tycoon. ARRRGH I NEED MORE DIAMONDS. I HATE THIS GAME I CANT STOP.

  • CM

    The witch’s attacks don’t cycle, but she never uses the same attack two times in a row so I dunno, take advantage of that?

    Does anyone know if there’s any difference between those three swords you can buy on the 5th level? They all seem the same.

  • wooha

    ok so I beat the false god, I beat the watch dog, and I got him as a pet.

    Now what?

  • wooha

    oh, so if you go back to the shrines you get new bosses. The shine of fate now has these gold bag bombs!!!

  • WNF

    Helpful hint for those who’ve defeated the witch and want money: up the crap out of your intelligence, get circler, and farm Dark Cloud. You can kill him in 5 seconds flat and he pays out 15-30k. Not as much as the mutant cyclops but definitely faster. Until you up intelligence to at least 15, then you can whip his ass well good too. Also useful for farming Poseidon.

  • e

    This sounds like a good entry for indiefaqs. It would be really useful to compile enemy weaknesses, farming tips, etc there.

    Did anyone notice the *mutant* cyclops wears blue with yellow details and shoots a red laser out his eye. Remind you of anyone?

  • wooha

    ok for the fairy boss in the shrine of endurance.

    Her hp is linked to the 1st thing she attacks, so if you use indigo=rodger her hp will go down fast but then she wont die!


  • wooha

    sigh I cant get the game to work any more, it just sends me to the main page.

    I might just have to give up

  • wooha

    back on track

    Great Wall, the new boss in the shrine of might is hurt by your sword but healed by any magic.

    So unequip your chaser and whack away.
    He only gives 100g and always respawns.

  • CoR

    Barrgh…Can’t beat Yggdrasil…What element is it?

  • Zaratus

    Bah, can’t beat the watchdog. Well, there’s three different dogs it seems, Hellhound, Cerberus, Orthros.

    Is there something I’m missing? I was sick of the grinding, used a hex editor on the save file to give myself max gold, upgraded a LOT and still die way too fast. Guess I should upgrade more, but it’s still a lot of clicking to upgrade defense 1000 times. =/

    And the pixie, just won’t die? I get her health down to zero, and she doesn’t die. Err, and are you supposed to do anything special with the cloning slimes? I touch them all, they all go poof, and nothing happens.

    And how about the exploding treasure room? It seems there *one* bag out of those you can take, but it’s just a measly 100 gold.

  • wooha

    @Zaratus reset your electricsword then just attack him with chaser. make sure to max your int

    I think the the last few rooms are just for fun.

    The multiple slime can be defeated by just running into them lol!

  • Dusty Spur

    CoR: I believe I used Dark on Yggdrasil and did okay. I’m pretty sure you can recruit Nin Nin by then, make sure to do that. Also try to make your sword is wide enough where you can stick near the bottom of the screen, to allow more time to dodge the falling lightning bolts.

  • JohnA

    So any tips for dracula? :D Or maybe a good hidden area to make money until I can farm enough to beat him

  • JohnA

    and by dracula I mean death. >.>; my bad

  • e

    To beat death, farm diamonds off the snow queen (she is weak to dark). Pump up a weapon with diamonds (lots) then kill the witch and farm onyx (?) and give your armour dark protection. Then you can pretty easily beat death with nin-nin.

    Be careful if you need more diamonds, as you will have to switch your armour as the snow queen’s attacks are light based.

  • Pfizer

    Beat it. At least, I beat the False God, Cerberus and Avatar (in space!).

    Ended up using a script to farm the wastes all night while I slept. Woke up with 1.3 billion. That helped.

    Game doesn’t have a very satisfying ending. Avatar drops all kinds of money/gems and an item that makes all of the enemies MUCH stronger. I have an 1100 level energy sword. It’s so thick and long that it’s first little square segment takes up most of the screen. It barely scratched the FIRST BOSS. ;_;

    It’d be neat if you could see how big it really is. I imagine it’s at least 100 screens long and a at least 3 or four thick.

  • CoR

    Well I’m on Death now..Farming Diamonds off Valkeries ;o

  • captain_duck

    Oh man after…. 8 hours i think and im at the end boss…. but i need a lot more diamonds to kill him :( . Farming is getting easier though, got a level 270 katana with 730 dark energy and can kill the snow queen in ~20 hits now.

    But damn the heart attack, charm or whatever you call it is annoying. Is there something that makes you immune to that?

    Also, where are those high cash enemies? Theres no way im gonna grind to get the chaser spell like this.

  • wooha

    @Pfizer how do you get avatar? I still dont know how to beat fairy and the gold bags :(

  • wooha

    Oh yeah your sword is only 1100? Im at 1500 right now im thinking 3000 should be good enough for the last boss!

  • Dusty Spur

    Joy of infinite joy. I’m at the False God. fffffffffffff

  • JohnA

    So I’m pretty much ready to quit this game, but after investing like 10+ hours into it already, I’m really tempted to cheat just to see the ending and not make my wasted time useless.

    Anyone know where the flash save file is at? I need to do some hex’ing

  • CoR

    Finally got chaser after farming that stupid snowfield map..

  • Choque

    I really enjoy this game!
    did anyone else beat The Doppelganger?
    It drops a “energy sword”!!!

  • Dusty Spur

    I am way too unmotivated to grind long enough to beat False God (I can barely scratch him and he kills me in 2-4 shots) so I am going to go ahead and second that request for the location of the flash save file to do some hexing.

  • Zaratus

    Just do a system search for “ginormo” you should find the folder it’s in.

    The value for gold isn’t in hex, exactly, so you have to figure out which one stands for gold the hard way. (Or I can just tell you)

    For me, the folder on Vista is C:usersUSERNAMEAppDataRoamingMacromediaFlash Player#SharedObjectsP64STC8Sbabarageo.comflashginormoginormo.swf

    I just threw some high values in there, and it turned my gold into scientific notation because the number was so huge. After picking up one bag of gold, it reset my gold to max gold (just about 10 TRILLION gold)

    I’ll just include the entire offset line my hex editor gives: Offset 1352=0x548

    It starts shortly after where it says armorgreen6 in the file, and it has ValA1 and some stuff, then ValB1.

    There should be a value of 00 after ValB1, then the values I have after that are 42 a2 2a 97 0e 42 06

    That should give you my current gold, 9,987,066,110,211.

    If you play around in here, you can even have it so that it shows that you’ve fought every type of monster for the library, though you gotta do it one by one.

  • Zaratus

    Ahh, easier way to cheat is get a .sol editor. No need for hex values. Just stuck all my stats at 8000+


  • Zaratus

    Alright, how the hell do you get to Avatar?

    Using babelfish on the wiki, it looks like you have to equip the cup and do the four shrines. I beat the wall, the pixie, stomped the slimes, and got the bag of gold without going boom. Nothing. It seems like the cup should glow or something, letting me go off the side of the world map into space, but nothing.

    Am I missing something?

  • Dusty Spur

    Thanks, Zaratus! This .sol editing thing is (hella) tight.

  • Dusty Spur

    Okay I figured out three of the shrines but the Pixie makes no sense to me. Anyone care to explain how to kill it?

  • Zaratus

    For the pixie, just sit there and let it hit you.

  • CoR

    Zaratus. You need 99% of your monster library complete I think.

    And I beat doppelganger! used a lvl 1 armor and sword, and jacked up my int to 108 and used chaser. Took me 3min xD

  • Valkyrie

    The Doppelganger is easy. I used my level 9 armor, and (now) my level 2510 dagger. Make your sword as thin as possible and stab him in the feet. I did it without a single hit.

  • Cheater

    Asmodeus is… though. I’m missing the monster between Orthos and the first boss now.

  • Pyabo

    Did anyone legitimately beat Death or the False God? This game seems to be impossible without cheating.

    Good game… too grindy, but good game… up until the end.

  • wooha

    @pyabo I beat both of them.

    Just grind it out a bit they are easy.

    Make sure to up your vitality a lot.

  • Dusty Spur

    I beat Death legitimately. He’s not too hard if you have good dark protection.

  • Neddo

    Is there actually a way to survive the exploding gold bag trap in the Shrine of Luck?

  • CoR

    I beat Death easily with a 200 light sword…that just barely though…because NinNin died at around half way…and I only had 40 dark on my armor…I’m currently farming money for false god…I’m thinking I’ll need alot of str and int…So I’m farming money off the trees.

  • Neddo

    Hmm.. nevermind about my previous post. I forgot about the amazing magnetic properties of gold.

  • Zaratus

    Ahh, I figured it out for Avatar it seems. I equipped the cup and fought all the bosses again (including hellhound), and redid the ‘secret’ rooms. Then the cup started glowing and let me go to space.

    As a bonus – equip the star and play more in ‘hard mode’ =P

  • Action Bastard

    To farm gold, find the optional area “Gg Frozen Waste” on the second from the last screen. It’s a little bit left of the Tower of Yjs. Spend lots of gold on luck: this increases the money you get from enemies, plus makes powerful enemies appear a lot sooner. Almost any enemy can appear here, so it’s a good place to expand your library.

    If you have the electro sword, you can expand it to cover most of the screen. Combined with the seeker spell, you can wipe out an entire screen of enemies with one or two clicks, making gold farming fast.

    Once you’ve defeated everything in the shrines, the cup becomes the Trophy of Glory. Equip it, then walk off the edge of the world map: you’ll see the world and the moon where the Avatar is at. You DON’T need any certain percentage in the library. You also don’t need to defeat all of the guard dogs.

    I haven’t beat the Avatar yet, and all my stats are around 600 without cheating.

  • Zaratus

    Ahh, just to mention – Avatar is weak vs. Dark, rather than Light.

    Apparently, if you got the hyper armor from the golden knight, it’s quite useful there too.

  • dr miladi

    An amazing testimony on a spell caster who brought my wife back to me..
    My name is Andy Sowers,i live in Australia,and I’m happily married to a lovely and caring wife,with two kids.A very big problem occurred in my family seven months ago,between me and my terrible that she took the case to court for a divorce.she said that she never wanted to stay with me again,and that she didn’t love me anymore.So she packed out of my house and made me and my children passed through severe pain. I tried all my possible means to get her back,after much begging,but all to no avail.and she confirmed it that she has made her decision,and she never wanted to see me again.
    So on one evening,as i was coming back from work,i met an old friend of mine who asked of my wife.So i explained every thing to her,so she told me that the only way i can get my wife back,is to visit a spell caster,because it has really worked for her too.So i never believed in spell,but i had no other choice,than to follow her advice. Then she gave me the email address of the spell caster whom she visited.{ [email protected]}.
    So the next morning,i sent a mail to the address she gave to me,and the spell caster assured me that i will get my wife back the next day.What an amazing statement!! I never believed,so he spoke with me,and told me everything that i need to do. Then the next morning, So surprisingly, my wife who didn’t call me for the past seven {7}months,gave me a call to inform me that she was coming back.So Amazing!! So that was how she came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and she apologized for her mistake,and for the pain she caused me and my children. Then from that day,our relationship was now stronger than how it were before,by the help of a spell caster.
    So, i will advice you out there to kindly visit the same website { [email protected]},if you are in any condition like this,or you have any problem related to “bringing your ex back.
    So thanks to the [email protected] for bringing back my wife,and brought great joy to my family once again.
    { [email protected]},