Dildo Tank

By: Guest Reviewer

On: December 21st, 2009


[This is a guest review and interview by Fuzz.]

How does one begin to describe Dildo Tank? Is it a porn game? Is it a brilliant re-invisioning of the side-scrolling shooter? Is it a meditation on the eternal differences between man and woman? A philosophical treatise on stupidity versus wrong-headedness?

Dildo Tank is all of these things and more. The latest collaboration of Jazzuo and Amon26, it opens with an awe-inspiring duet between the two artists, culminating in the final, repeated lyric, “you are weak in the knees”. Here the option is presented to play the game in either normal or censored mode. If you click on censored, the vaginas will be blurred out, as part of an attempt by Jazzuo to make all his games family friendly, regardless of subject matter (see Boobza Sports for US Kids). Proceeding to the first story screen, we learn that a man named Joon has need of our pilot skills in order to help destroy the women with no heads, who are trying to destroy mankind. From here on, the goal is simple: shoot your nude adversaries with poison dildos in order for their vaginas to absorb the harmful chemicals contained within these phallic objects. The implementation, however, is rather difficult, as you will be forced to confront all manner of giant naked women, including ones with spiked boots, laser shooting vaginas, and drills for feet.

Jazzuo’s work may be crude, but it shows a keen eye for design. The stages are carefully constructed to gradually acclimate the player to greater and greater amounts of spikes and enemies. Technique is taught through accidental experience; every player is sure to notice soon enough that the feet of the women should be ridden upon in order to more easily target them and avoid the spikes. One section in particular forces the player to ride a horde of women across a field of lethal spikes, while still attempting to shoot them. The choice has to be made: should I kill the women right away, or allow them to carry me across this spike field? Each new type of enemy is first introduced as a boss, with more health than they would normally have. The whole experience feels as though it was intended to be exactly as it is.

The graphics, while sub-par, are charming, and it is obvious that a fair amount of work went into them. The music perfectly suits the atmosphere of the game and again showcases Amon26’s stellar compositional skills. Jazzuo’s sound effects, entirely composed of his own grunts and squeals, are exceptional. The story is revealed in small portions through intermission text, as the main character’s instant messenger communications with his friends or enemies. I was not able to learn of the conclusions made by the game, as I was incapacitated by a large woman with a metal thong covering her genitals, but what I did see impressed me, as it explored much more than would be expected for a game with such a premise.

The game is available for download here, while the trailer can be viewed here.

Hit the jump for an interview with Jazzuo:

Interview with Jazzuo

TIGSource: Are your games intended to shock or provoke, or are they just created based on the topics that you find interesting?

Jazzuo: Some games are meant to shock and provoke some are not. I sometime make provocative games to let people know i am here and to get some feedback. Some times i make erotic games for same purpose. But i never forget to use some interesting and unique gameplay concept. I also believe that i do provoke by implementing new ideas. Especially those hardworking guys with not much ideas dislike me. Sometimes i just make something that interest me, but provocative stuff and erotics stuff are often what interests me.

TIGS: While your games may appear crude on first glance, there is usually a lot of depth to the inner workings of the game. How do you generally go out about designing any particular section of a game?

Jazzuo: Well they are crude. Since I start with gameplay. I first program the gameplay I have in my mind. And when I do that I make all the graphics and sound just so that I can publicize my game. In early years of Gamemaker community I could get some attention with this approach. I try to do little more with presentation now. Since there are so many freeware games now, totally crude games will not even get a single download. And my old games also have small hidden messages since at that time I believed I am a genius that will be discovered. The reward in sexy hiking is great example. I challenge you to play my old games and look for strange connection between games and hidden messages.

rape


TIGS: Some of your creations, such as Rape and Dildo Tank, seem to exhibit a great deal of misogyny; do you consider men to be on a higher plane than women in regards to intelligence and overall worth?

Jazzuo: Rape is very strange game. I made this when i was in art school my first years and wanted to prove game is an art. So i made something with contemporary art feeling. Make game that is fun in gameplay but makes you uneasy, something like Edmund. Its not about personal opinion. Now dildo tank is a different story. It is extremely exaggerated but there are my opinions on girls and boys coexistence. Most people see more criticism on women but I think it is fifty fifty. The difference is women are depict more to stupid and men more to wrong. And that is also my big question to the world. Why it is more offensive to show someone as stupid then as wrong.

TIGS: You seem to place a lot of emphasis on innovation in gameplay concepts. How important do you consider this to be for the overall enjoyment of a game?

Jazzuo: I am not sure how important it is for enjoyment of playing a game. Most people don’t play my games because they don’t want to learn new gameplays. But it is essential for enjoyment of programming a game. It is the reason for me to make a game. I have an idea and programing is experiment if I can program it and if the concept works. Often I change it and let it evolve during the programing. I learn a lot and have fun doing it.

TIGS: How was it collaborating with Amon26 on Dildo Tank? Did your collaboration positively affect the outcome of the final product?

Jazzuo: Well I did collaborate with Amon26 on Yellow ninja’s extreme zero as well. And it was great. I always didn’t want to do collaboration, because it was about waiting for someone to do his part of work. That is also a reason why my games are all about programmers art. But Amon was very fast and made his job in time so I could do my work in my own pace. And the music is really nice. I think the games came out very nicely. I especially like the vagina he drew me for dildo tank. I made them really ugly.

yellowninja

TIGS: The Yellow Ninja seems to pop up quite often in your advertisements and he is the main character in Yellow Ninja: Extreme Zero. To what extent is he based on yourself?

Jazzuo: Boobza girl, John Packadge, Gunboy, John Asscratch, Yellow ninja, Blue muscle they are all representation of part of what I am or I want to be. And I am to keep identity of Yellow ninja to my self, so I cannot answer. Well ninja wears cape for a reason.

TIGS: Your characters and gameplay concepts are often quite unique. Do you tend to spend a while thinking about what you would like in your game, or do you simply add content as the ideas come to you?

Jazzuo: Mostly it is fast process. And I like to participate in various competition because the tasks always give me new ideas. Otherwise I tend to get my ideas based on real life situations.

TIGS: Several of your games can be considered erotic or pornographic. Should pornography be considered a valid art form when done in an interesting way?

Jazzuo: I am not sure. It is entertainment. It could be art but it is not my case. What I want to achieve with these game is to make game that are not only visually erotic but the gameplay it self has something unique that only sexy theme can offer. I cannot say I hate the conventional erotic games because I do like visual porn, but I am still sad there isn’t much creativity in this field. I hope more creative people will start making porn games like me.

TIGS: You’ve made several Star Wars games; are you a great fan of George Lucas’s work, or is it simply a world that you enjoy creating games for?

Jazzuo: Well Star Wars has such memorable action moments, speed bike in woods, sword fight training with eyes covered. Star wars VII and Star wars VII dark side of story was my dream come true. They are games I wanted to play and I made them by my self. There are no other games that can give you the feeling of sword figh with covered eyes or extremely speedy fighting in woods. I started making them partially because Star Wars games get more attention then others but it is mainly about the love.

star wars episode vii

TIGS: Your games are often extremely difficult. Do you value challenge as an important aspect of the replay-ability of a game?

Jazzuo: This is actually little bit of mistake. I program the games my self. And unfortunately none of my real life friends are much of computer game players. So I do all testings my self. And I get always so good at my games that I just make the games hard. Difficulty progression is something I am really bad at and I know it. And when I try to make easy levels I feel like it is an insult how stupid it is and make maximally one such level.

MASOCHIST MEETS THE SADIST

TIGS: The website for your Kamila games states that they were inspired by conversations that you had with your girlfriend. How much has she influenced the majority of your games?

Jazzuo: Basicly kamilka my life love, with whom I am not anymore did influence many games. She appears in many other games like, sadist meets pacifist or wild girls. And actually dildo tank is a little bit inspired by the relationship experience and frustrations.

TIGS: Do you consider your games to have progressed greatly in quality since you first began releasing them to the public?

Jazzuo: Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. This is difficult. They did change a lot. But I think all game depict well my state of mind of given time. I think my games now go more to the playability. But old game have its beauty and magic.

TIGS: How much time do you generally spend on making games in the average week?

Jazzuo: Well it depends. I in fact program my games very fast. Gamemaker is my kind of a program. I finish the basics mostly in 2, 3 days. Then I have to force my self for weeks to finish the game. But basicly I have 1 or 2 days a week for programing. I work, I make music, I do design, and think about big things and come up with incredible thoughts.

TIGS: The art style in your work is immediately identifiable from the strange mix of 2D and 3D aspects as well as photography. Do you put a great deal of effort into developing a unique art style, or is it simply programmer’s art?

Jazzuo: Lately I try a little more. But basically the mixture of 2d and 3d comes from the fact that backgrounds and tiles are easier to draw and animations are easier to make in 3d on anim8or. Yes it is programmers art.

TIGS: How long do you think it will take for the mainstream to accept the concept that video games can, in fact, be art?

Jazzuo: I think lot of people do understand that. And I feel no problem in this. What I want to see is more open mind of players. Most players are willing to learn gameplay of mainstream commercial games. Even though they are so many weapons and items and what ever. I would like people to take little more time with free games, take them little more seriously and be willing to learn new gameplay, accept its style and so on. Otherwise I am not fan of pure art games. I believe game should be a game and I look always for some uniqueness in gameplay. For example rape is my kind of artgame but it has interesting well done catching a girl gameplay to it. But there are exception as cactus whose art talent is so huge, I don’t mind even if its just a plain shooter. I just wish there would be less wonnabies of the cactus and meshoft.

Sexy Hiking

TIGS: Sexy Hiking made you somewhat famous within the independent games community; how do you feel about its success? Do you think it is a good representation of your work?

Jazzuo: It actually is the best. Take something simple and unexpected and make a crazy game. Make sure concept is unique and original, programing works and each level is unique. And also there is my rough art I was so much in love at that time. With this game I gave absolutely no shit for others, it was my pride. I did it as I felt. And i think it actually says on my web-site I am proud of this game of them all. And the reward is just crazy. I am amazed even now how early in age I fell in love with my self.

TIGS: You’ve become known as the father of the B Game. Are you proud of this achievement, and the way in which you inspired the competition of the same name on the Tigsource forums?

Jazzuo: I am extremely. I used to write by my self that I am a king of GM minigames. Now I have a title that was given to me. And there is no GM in it. It is a world wide respected title. I am really glad to people that rediscovered sexy hiking and everything. And although I am a controversial trouble maker I would like to end the interview with this big thanks.

Jazzuo
  • lp

    aaaw so much hate on the christmas?

  • Quanrian

    I would normally say a game like this is a shallow, vapid experience, but this one actually has one redeeming quality, the design. The storyline from beginning to end is not going to shine any insight onto the relations between women and men as it really is pure satire. I did mention the gameplay, and yes the gameplay is actually quite good, and less crude games could learn a thing or two in design from D Tank. In other words, if you get past the content matter, which most adults should be aquainted with by now, then the game is actually a good challenge from beginning to end.

    So, while I am somewhat embarassed I downloaded, and furthermore beat the game, I do appreciate that Derek is not afraid to post games like this. Thanks Derek for being so brave, and I will just impatiently wait for Spelunky to come out on XBLA. Happy Holidays for the rest of you, and if nothing else, this game would make a good gag gift.

  • jazzuo

    heeeeeeeeeey another one finished the game!! dapdap (with queen music in background)

    and i cogratualte fuzz to make great choice to put game with interview together. It really does fill the gaps. I didnt even imagine people would see it as so offensive… i guess you people dont watch porn at all.

    Heppy hollydays!!!!

  • Joseph

    If you could help…
    Would you help?
    And if you do help…
    Would you be helpful?

    LOLOLOL

  • mostlytigerproof

    Someone get this to Fumito Ueda. This is Shadow of the Colossus done correctly.

  • afewmonthslater

    Breaking news. Fumito Ueda announces B-Game project. Shadow of the Colossdicks to be fourth ICO game.

  • apl

    jazzuo haters vacate, for dildo tank is a masterpiece in all ways.

  • [email protected]

    Wow I cant believe how many people here are reacting like babies. The art is good, the game works, its clearly planned out and executed. What the fuck have you guys made before?

    People like Adam and GoSign, need a DSD shoved up their asses.

    DSD = Double sided Dildo

  • undertech

    This game is going to be such a fantastic training tool for something

  • gpsychosis

    It’s a true mark of creativity when artists like Jazzuo, Cactus, and Messhof consistently explore different gameplay, aesthetic, and narrative concepts.

    I can safely say Amon26 has similar creative authority after playing both Au Sable and Dildo Tank. I’m thankful for his (her?) earlier comment regarding pretentious game subject matter.

  • mosh

    I personally loved this game. Some people take shit way too seriously. Sweet mechanics.

  • Sergio

    I’m pretty sure Fuzz should become a permanent TIGS editor/poster.

  • Anthony Flack

    Glad to see the tiresome sanctimonious comments seem to be in the minority with this one.